{"id":4614,"date":"2012-08-22T08:50:37","date_gmt":"2012-08-22T15:50:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/?p=4614"},"modified":"2012-08-30T22:51:48","modified_gmt":"2012-08-31T05:51:48","slug":"review-battleship-dvd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/2012\/08\/review-battleship-dvd\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: Battleship DVD"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/em><\/strong>Battleship<\/em><\/strong> is what\u2019s wrong with Hollywood. I have no problem with movies with mindless, simple plot-lines but at least show some effort rather than throwing $200M+ at the screen and hope people merely call it good.<\/p>\n

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Battleship (2012)<\/strong><\/p>\n


REVIEW NAVIGATION<\/strong><\/span>
The Movie<\/a> | Special Features<\/a> | Video Quality<\/a> | Audio Quality<\/a> | Overall<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

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Genre(s): <\/strong>Action, Science Fiction
Universal | PG13 \u2013 131 min. \u2013 $29.98 | August 28, 2012<\/p>\n

MOVIE INFO:<\/span>
Directed by: <\/strong>Peter Berg
Writer(s): <\/strong>Jon Hoeber & Erich Hoeber (written by)
Cast: <\/strong>Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsg\u00e5rd, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker, Liam Neeson<\/p>\n

Theatrical Release Date: <\/strong>May 18, 2012<\/p>\n

DISC INFO:<\/span>
Features: <\/strong>Featurettes
Number of Discs: <\/strong>1<\/p>\n

Audio: <\/strong>English (Dolby Digital 5.1), French (Dolby Digital 5.1), Spanish (Dolby Digital 5.1)
Video: <\/strong>Anamorphic Widescreen 2.40
Subtitles: <\/strong>English SDH, French, Spanish<\/p>\n

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THE MOVIE<\/strong> \u2013 2.0\/5<\/strong><\/h2>\n

After watching Battleship<\/em><\/strong>, the latest film to show that Hollywood has completely run out of ideas, I couldn\u2019t help but recall John Travolta\u2019s opening dialogue in Swordfish<\/em>: \u201cYou know what the problem with Hollywood is? They make shit. Unbelievable, unremarkable shit.\u201d Granted, it might be hypocritical to quote a movie like Swordfish<\/em> but it is apropos in this situation. Obviously going in, I knew this would be an uphill battle, pardon the pun, to get through but I at least had hoped it offered some surprises… I was sadly mistaken.<\/p>\n

The \u201cstory\u201d follows Alex Hopper (TAYLOR KITSCH), a young man whose life has gone wayward despite prodding by his older, more responsible brother, Stone Hopper (ALEXANDER SKARSGARD), a Navy Commander. Alex lives on his brother\u2019s couch and has little direction going on.<\/p>\n

In Hollywood fashion, despite being a jobless loser, he\u2019s able to finagle the heart of hot women the latest is blonde bombshell Sam (BROOKLYN DECKER) who is at a bar one night with a craving for a chicken burrito but the \u201ckitchen\u201d (i.e. bar microwave) was closed. To prove his affection, and to get her number, Alex offers to get her one at the convenience store and bring it back. Unfortunately that store has just closed and in desperation decides to commit felony burglary, breaking in through the roof (crashing to the floor). The police are quickly on the scene but Alex, being the Prince Charming he is, runs with all his might, taking taser fire left and right, to get Sam her burrito. Don\u2019t know about anyone else, but it brought a tear to my eye.<\/p>\n

Meanwhile, remembering this movie is about… something or other, we get some space techno-chatter where NASA has discovered a planet far away that might have the same properties as Earth, so they\u2019ve established a satellite that can carry a transmission in the hopes of creating some kind of contact with an extra terrestrial. As a side, did I mention this movie is called Battleship<\/em><\/strong>? Just letting you know you didn\u2019t accidentally click on a Transformers<\/em> review.<\/p>\n

What follows is some more dumb plot points and these evil ET’s slamming into Earth with plans to to take over and bring over, through the signal, more of their fellow… aliens. And wouldn’t you know it, it’s up to that slacker Alex and his gang of merry men, and girl in the case of Rihanna, to save the day. It’s entirely believable, I mean the guy did manage to give a girl a burrito after all!<\/p>\n

I wouldn\u2019t have a problem if it at least provided some entertainment value rather than inane, strung-together so-called plot points and lame, half-assed\/clich\u00e9d, so-called character development. Instead the story is really, really stupid and the acting is even far worse. Let\u2019s begin with the man Hollywood seems to be desperate to make into a superstar: Taylor Kitsch. The young man whose career took off on the fan-favorite series, \u201cFriday Night Lights\u201d, is having a career whirlwind after appearing in the box office bust, John Carter<\/em>. AS far as his performance in Battleship<\/em><\/strong>: eh, he\u2019s not bad yet his character is so bland and uninteresting, it\u2019s really hard to care about his, or the others, outcome.<\/p>\n

The supporting cast is just as unoriginal as our hero. You\u2019ve got the much maligned Rihanna in a small role with primarily one-liners that don\u2019t even sound good in the trailers; Brooklyn Decker playing the prototypical gorgeous love interest who you haven\u2019t a clue why she would even be with the protagonist (doing a B&E for a burrito isn\u2019t charming); rising star Alexander Skarsg\u00e5rd as Kitsch\u2019s brother isn\u2019t bad but he doesn\u2019t have a whole lot to do and exits early on that he makes little impact; and finally Liam Neeson who apparently has not seen a screenplay he hasn\u2019t liked with such a brief appearance that when he re-appears in the film, you forgot he was still around.<\/p>\n

The other issue I had is that rather than giving the film some focus either on a plot or characters, even for a summer flick, it seems director Peter Berg wanted the audience to see every bit of the purported $209M budget in each and every scene. Apparently only a minuscule amount was spent on the screenplay which was written by John and Erich Hoeber who previously wrote Whiteout<\/em>, Red<\/em> and the upcoming Red 2<\/em>. I can\u2019t place too much blame on either of them because how do you even begin to write a movie based on a board game? However, making it a mere carbon copy of a Transformers<\/em> movie wasn\u2019t the best move.<\/p>\n

In the end, Battleship<\/em><\/strong> is all pizzazz and absolutely no substance. Outside of one sequence towards the end, which was then quickly abandoned since I think even the writers that it was dumb, bears little (i.e. no) resemblance to the board game which begs the question: why the hell even make the movie in the first place? I\u2019ve rarely come across a movie which has absolutely no redeeming features: the characters are weak, the plot inane and ridiculous and just the all-around entertainment value isn\u2019t there. Sure, there\u2019s a bucket load of money that was spent between the production value, visual effects and advertising, but it amounts to nothing.<\/p>\n

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SPECIAL FEATURES \u2013 2.25\/5<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Preparing for Battle (11:09)<\/span><\/strong> tries to explain why and how the hell they came up with the idea to turn the board game into a feature film.<\/p>\n

All Hands on Deck: The Cast (11:40)<\/span><\/strong> \u2013 This featurette introduces us to each of the major players. In between behind-the-scenes footage, Peter Berg and the cast talk about one another. A bit of a yawn but it does show that they at least had fun working together.<\/p>\n

Engage in Battle (6:58)<\/span><\/strong> is a two-part featurette on shooting at sea and on the ships and the difficulties that come with them<\/p>\n

Previews<\/strong> \u2013 Werewolf: The Beast Among Us<\/em>, Death Race 3: Inferno<\/em>, Dead in Tombstone<\/em>, The Five-Year Engagement<\/em><\/p>\n

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VIDEO \u2013 4.0\/5<\/strong><\/h2>\n

<\/em><\/strong><\/em><\/strong><\/em><\/strong>Battleship<\/em><\/strong> is presented in its original 2.40 anamorphic widescreen aspect ratio and, for the most part, looks good. There are the occasional bits of normal artifacting for a DVD but the picture is clean and sharp enough. Nothing extraordinary here though it should be good enough for most home viewers.
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AUDIO \u2013 4.5\/5<\/strong><\/h2>\n

The Dolby Digital 5.1 track provided is simply put, boomtastic. The dialogue levels are nice but the biggest feature is during the action scenes which put on a great show with an awesome LFE channel to go along with the front and rear channels which make for a dynamic track.<\/p>\n

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OVERALL \u2013 2.5\/5<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Overall, Battleship<\/em><\/strong> is what\u2019s wrong with Hollywood. I have no problem with movies with mindless, simple plotlines but at least show some effort rather than throwing $200M+ at the screen and hope people merely call it good. Thankfully the North American audiences weren\u2019t buying it since it only made $65M so hopefully that sends a signal to Hollywood that people expect more.<\/p>\n

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Brian Oliver, The Movieman<\/em>
Published: <\/strong>08\/22\/2012<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Battleship is what\u2019s wrong with Hollywood. I have no problem with movies with mindless, simple plot-lines but at least show some effort rather than throwing $200M+ at the screen and hope people merely call it good.    <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[1028,1643,888,1647,329,1646,1645,1644],"class_list":["post-4614","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dvd-reviews","tag-alexander-skarsgard","tag-battleship","tag-brooklyn-decker","tag-hasbro","tag-liam-neeson","tag-peter-berg","tag-rihanna","tag-taylor-kitsch"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4614","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4614"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4614\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4665,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4614\/revisions\/4665"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4614"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4614"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moviemansguide.com\/main\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4614"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}